Mixed Feelings..

I have a very strange couple of weeks to get through and some very mixed feelings about it all. Maybe, blogging friends, you'll be able to help me think them through.

On Saturday last, my son rang to say that Noodles other Grandad (her Mum's Dad) had died suddenly at the age of 57. He had a massive heart attack at the gym and had died before anybody could help him. He'd had a full medical check up a week or so before which failed to identify heart disease, which I find incomprehensible. But then, knowing him, he probably never complained about how he felt so nobody knew. His wife and three daughters all relied on him totally and Noodles Mum especially. She being the youngest daughter. They are all in shock and understandably very sad and tearful most of the time. We saw Noodle this morning when we took round her Easter egg. She seemed very distant. Probably feeling confused, bless her. Mum and new partner were taking Noodle out to a farm to see the baby lambs. Probably a good idea for all of them to do something normal. The funeral is still 10 days away. A long time to hold ones breath methinks. I feel very sorry for all the family.

Son was very upset about the death of Noodles other Grandad. So much so that it caused a problem with his new partner. This is a good thing though as it has brought a few things to a head in that relationship and he's been able to clear his head of some old stuff. It's been difficult though and of course (and rightly) he's been sharing his feelings with me and I hope I've been able to help him think things through.

Also, we had arranged to visit my Dad and his wife in Dorset over the Easter holiday. Because of my Mum's problems over the winter I have not been able to see my Dad since last May, though we speak on the phone two or three times a week. Yesterday morning his wife rang to say she had gone down with the flu. She sounded very poorly and was very disappointed that we would not be able to come down after all. This morning I rang to check how things were and now Dad has caught the flu too. They are both in their eighties and I do worry when they get poorly but Dad at least is in good spirits. We've promised to go down another weekend as soon as they are well enough. I'll check on them again tomorrow of course and will offer to travel down to help out if it sounds as if I'm needed. But first I have to travel to Chichester on Monday and stay over at my Aunt's place so that, on Tuesday, I can take my Mum back to her home in Essex. My brother is driving her to Chichester today. I had planned to pick Mum up on the way back from Dorset but of course that plan has had to change.

What with my son's problems, my Dad being poorly and Noodle being all mixed up it's going to be a tough couple of weeks. It's the time in my life when I find myself worrying about parents, children and grandchildren and at the moment everybody seems to need a piece of me. Does that sound selfish?? Well, I've got it off my chest anyway. Thanks for listening.